Promises, Promises

Two weeks from now, we will have a new president, I hope. That’s assuming the election is actually decided by the voters not the courts. Please let that be the case.

As much as I’ve enjoyed this 12-month Olympic Games of politics, I’m ready for it to be over. I am weary of the process. The pundits are annoying. The campaign “surrogates” are predictable and offer no interesting insights. And the stunts, pandering and platitudes are so transparent sometimes all a person can do is laugh.

In an earnest website video, McCain promises to “rebuild our savings and make our investments grow again.” A cornerstone of his plan is allowing homeowners the chance to trade in “burdensome” mortgages for “manageable” ones.

While he’s at it, he may as well just erase those darned mortgages altogether. Not only are they burdensome, they are irritating. And I could buy a lot more fun stuff if it weren’t for that tiresome house payment every, single, month.

McCain also promises to create a National Commission on Workplace Flexibility and Choice. Their purpose isn’t entirely clear, but I believe they will explore ways to ensure that not only are we free to choose where we work, but when, how much and what we will be paid. I’ll be giving myself a huge raise if McCain wins.

Because he’s behind in the polls, McCain’s floating a real game changer -- a “Jeans Day, Every Day,” mandate. But don’t go stocking up on Levi’s yet. The Workplace Flexibility Commission won’t convene until the Straight Talk Express concludes a nationwide schedule of Volunteerism Summits. McCain wants to complete the “Thousand Points of Light” by Christmas.

As for Obama, it’s not surprising he’s ahead in the polls. When elected president, he will end discrimination and poverty, eliminate high school drop outs and ensure that all students receive a quality education.

And that’s just the first 100 days.

After that, he promises a living wage for all working families, mandatory retirement accounts for everyone and a week’s worth of paid sick leave in every job -- guaranteed. I heard he might even eliminate sickness altogether.

Have no fear all you business people who are worried about these requirements. You can always take up farming. When Obama is president his website said he will make farming both stable and predictable. The head of his new Climate Control Commission will be Mother Nature. Brilliant!

Obama has a lot of goodies in store for parents too. His “Zero to Five” plan calls for universal pre-school beginning at age zero. Read my lips, “NO MORE PARENTING!” Cool -- because the thing about parenting is, it’s such a big responsibility, and so much work.

My favorite Obama promise is “pain-free deliveries.” Where was he the last eight years when I was having babies?

Obama’s speech writers have already begun working on his inaugural address. It will be a moving speech, flawlessly delivered, echoing the words of beloved past American leaders with a modern twist.

“Ask not what you can do for your country,” our new president will say. “Ask what your country can do for you.”

Saving the Best for Last

Every once in a while, for no apparent reason, a chance of a lifetime falls in your lap. Mine came last week, packaged in a mysterious email from a Washington contact that contained a phone number and two words, “Call me.”

This triggered a chain of events that landed my daughter’s first grade class at the foot of the First Lady’s plane “Bright Star” to welcome her to North Dakota. And later that day, found me sharing “Cloud Nine” with a few others, all of us visiting with the First Lady over an intimate dinner at the University of Mary.

First, the airport. When organizers were looking for kids to meet the plane, I did what most mothers would do. I offered my child’s class.

One student excitedly told his mom about their pending field trip. “Mom, we’re going to meet the president’s wife tomorrow,” he said after school. “The president of what, Connor?” she replied. “The president of the UNITED STATES mom!” he said indignantly. Like, duh? Who else?

When these first graders arrived at the airport, they exploded out of their transport vans -- this despite the fact that most of them hardly knew of the First Lady and certainly didn’t realize what a cool plane she would have.

With the BHS band filling the air, these pint-sized patriots dressed head to toe in red, white, and blue marched toward the plane. They held a banner, “Welcome to North Dakota. Your 50^th State.” And my favorite part, “The Best for Last.”

The band played, “This is My Country” while the kids stood on the tarmac eagerly waving their flags and the impressive “blue top” plane taxied toward them. Many of the mom’s watching welled up with tears.

As the First Lady walked down those famous steps, I remembered what these innocent little kids were chanting minutes before. “Wel-come to A-mer-i-ca! Wel-come to A-mer-i-ca!”

I might be a little biased, but with the music, the kids, the sun radiating off the golden autumn fields and a cloudless blue sky enveloping us above, the sign seemed right on. “The Best for Last.” This is America.

Now, to the dinner. I don’t know what the credentials were for this event, but of this I’m sure. I did not have them. However, I wasn’t about to let the staffer who called to invite me in on that little secret. “North Dakota nice,” is one thing. That would be North Dakota stupid.

First Lady Bush looks exactly as she appears on television except for two things. Her stature is smaller, and her presence is larger. This is a strong woman who has seen and experienced a lot. She knows what she can do, what she wants to do, and she enjoys doing it.

My husband and others have asked, “What is she like?” The best way to describe her is with her familiar title. She is a teacher – the consummate teacher. Bright, inquisitive, kind, knowledgeable, friendly, relaxed, commanding.

What I really liked about Laura Bush was how unaffected she appears to be by the challenging and charmed life she has had as First Lady. She has no airs about her.

When she entered the room, she immediately set about trying to make us comfortable. She seemed genuinely interested in learning about North Dakota and North Dakota people. When I introduced myself, she was able to connect my name with the background I had supplied to her office. Cool! I want to do that when I grow up.

Mrs. Bush relayed how touched she was when women at the Sims Church broke out in a round of “God Bless America.” She also delighted in the after dinner performance of, “Come Home to North Dakota,” by Medora’s Job Christensen and Jan Gilbertson of Bismarck.

I loved how she talked about the White House like it is ours, not hers. She shared some fun stories about Theodore Roosevelt’s days there. And when Gov. Hoeven confessed to exploring the White House one night when he and Mikey were guests, Mrs. Bush chuckled and said in her distinctive Texas tone, “Of course – you might not get another chance.”

The role of First Lady doesn’t come with a job description, but Laura Bush has filled the position gracefully and effectively from the very beginning. We haven’t been subject to her wrangling over offices or roles or hairstyles for that matter.

For eight years, she has persistently promoted her passions – reading, education, history, art – and she has left her stamp on every state in the nation.

Thank you, Mrs. Bush, for making North Dakota your last, best stop.