What habits are defining you?

My mom and I took a week long road trip recently – just the two of us. Preparing for the trip, we set 4 p.m. as our targeted departure time. Three hours later, we finally hit the road.

While traveling we listened to an audio presentation by author and speaker Matthew Kelly. The subject was “Becoming the Best Version of Yourself.” The difference between average people and people who achieve greatness comes down to one thing, he says. It isn’t courage or brains or beauty. Not wealth or wisdom.

The difference is habits. Accomplished people are guided by great habits. I reflected sheepishly on our three-hour delay and my habit of tardiness.

We can learn a lot about leaders by their habits. Theodore Roosevelt was a voracious reader. Benjamin Franklin worked relentlessly. Mother Teresa’s habit was charity – she was singularly committed to it.

Closer to home, Ed Schafer’s endless energy stemmed from his dogged commitment to mid-day runs. John Hoeven is known for disciplined decision making.

We all have habits, good and bad. A big part of parenting involves nurturing good habits in our kids, habits perhaps we wish were our own. Flossing daily, eating vegetables, reading, telling the truth, sharing.

Experts say it takes 30 days to create a good habit. Six years later, we’re hoping our children soon learn the habit of saying please. Despite the seemingly endless reinforcement required, we press on with our kids, knowing that developing good habits now will be far easier than breaking bad ones later.

On a recent field trip with girlfriends, I asked about their best and worst habits. Several cited yelling or nagging. Others confessed to being chronically late. I’m habitually trying to overcome both of these bad habits, which stem from a more basic problem: over-estimating how much I can do.

Whether writing a column or packing for a trip, I frequently underestimate how long it will take This leaves me scrambling at the end, barking at my kids and trying to pull off my best work with far less time than necessary.

In the spectrum of bad habits, this one isn’t the worst. It does, however, create a lot of needless stress. The perpetual rush foils our efforts to face the world calmly and in good cheer, from noticing something cool or someone in need.

This is the problem with bad habits: they often come in multiples. Staying up too late makes people oversleep, impatient, tardy, under productive, too tired to exercise and more likely to overeat.

Some people claim to be creatures of habit, but in many ways we all are. We might have big goals and lofty ideals but ultimately our simple, daily habits -- constructive or destructive – determine what we accomplish. They draw us closer or further from the person we want to be.

Whatever good I’m able to achieve one thing is probably for certain. I’ll be late.

Let’s not be fools about food

My kids stared at a glass of bright green, frothy liquid I whipped up for their snack. Before they could turn up their nose and object, I enthusiastically announced, “Check it out -- Shrek Shakes!”

Whatever hesitation they initially felt vanished with those two magic words – Shrek and shake. They happily slurped down and asked for seconds of the vitamin-packed banana and yogurt concoction that gets its bold color from several heaping cups of fresh, raw spinach.

My husband, salesman that he is, mastered marketing food to the kids much sooner than I did. They cheer for Daddy’s World Famous Beans (a.k.a Van de Camp’s with extra mustard and brown sugar). And, in side-by-side taste tests, Daddy’s World Famous Pancakes (a.k.a. Krusteez powdered mix) regularly outperformed my genuinely homemade buttermilk pancakes. That is, until I launched Mommy’s World Famous Homemade Pancakes.

Despite the pathetic lack of originality of these names, our kids remain convinced that the daily hash we sling under the “world famous” banner lives up to its billing. (Maybe they aren’t that bright.)

Their gullibility is funny, until you consider how well the same tricks work on us. Restaurants promote Grandma’s cottage meatloaf, juicy Angus thick burgers, and hand-scooped, triple-thick milk shakes. And the tempting names move product.

Food psychologist Brian Wansink has spent his career researching the psychology of eating and has identified dozens of hidden persuaders, like marketing, that influence our food choices and often cause us to overeat.

For example, we will eat more out of large bowls and large plates, in the company of friends, when faced with great variety (buffets, Thanksgiving dinner), when we’re distracted (by books, television or a movies), and when we believe the food is suppose to be good (i.e. the juicy Angus thick burger).

His book, “Mindless Eating: Why We Eat More Than We Think,” is filled with results from his studies and outlines nine strategies for “re-engineering” our food choices and influencers. The book is both fascinating and practical.

Rather than restrictive diets calling for unsustainable changes that usually leave us face first in a gallon of ice cream, he argues for “stealth health.” These are small, positive changes that we can incorporate subtly into our lifestyles to become more healthy long term.

Some of his suggestions include:
1. See all you can eat: Plate your meals and snacks. Minimize seconds. Never eat out of a large bag or box and leave extra food on the stove not the table.
2. Make overeating a hassle not a habit. Put tempting foods in an inconvenient place. Store cookies in the freezer rather than a cookie jar. Place candy dishes across the room not beside the couch.
3. Be a good gatekeeper. If there’s no soda or Pop-Tarts in the house it’s hard to eat them.
4. Use the 50/50 rule: Reduce the size of your plate and fill half of it at every meal with fruits and vegetables.

Bookstores are filled with diet books, many of them best sellers, yet 63 percent of Americans are overweight. The truth is eating is fun and dieting stinks.

Wansink’s approach seems more realistic. Understand the influencers behind our eating habits and use them to our benefit. Rather than mindlessly gaining weight we can mindlessly lose or maintain our weight for a healthier lifestyle.

Time to make some cool, refreshing Shrek shakes.